I'd called BPAS but was referred to NUPAS and was given a choice of clinic

I wanted to share the story of my first pregnancy

Hi all, I hope this helps anyone who has found themselves reading these posts as I had. I wanted to share the story of my first pregnancy as a lot of the other posts on here are about people who already have children.

I had a medical abortion at 7 weeks, through a NUPAS centre. I just knew I was pregnant. Before the summer, my period would often fluctuate between being a week late or a week early. So When my breasts started hurting a week before I was due on, I didn’t think much of it. 

Read other stories about abortion generally or more specifically stories involving medical abortion and abortions taking place at 7 weeks of pregnancy.

I knew then that I must've been pregnant

The days ticked on by, and before I knew it I was late. I was having breast pain, bouts of diarrhoea and feeling tired all the time and I swear I felt different. I knew then, that at 23 years of age that I must have been pregnant.

I confessed my worries to my partner of three years. We both still live at home with our parents, his family are religious and believe that we are waiting for marriage. I am also in my final year of university in hopes of becoming a teacher.

We'd discussed the topic of abortion at length

We had discussed the topic of abortion at length when we began dating, and we both decided then that if we fell pregnant before marriage, that we wouldn’t keep it. I am not heartless, we both want children in the future. I just couldn’t imagine being a single parent at home and him only being able to visit a couple of times a week.

I was 5 days late when I eventually ordered a test from Amazon taking advantage of next day delivery. By this point, my breasts had ballooned, painful to the point of a brush of clothing against it and nausea had begun.

It was no surprise when two lines appeared

It was no surprise to me when two lines appeared. In my heart I had known for days I was pregnant, I knew the option I would take. Yet I still smiled, happily to myself thinking I had made a baby with the man I planned to marry.

That same day, I called BPAS [More stories involving BPAS abortion clinics]. They asked various questions about my weight and height, which in my nervousness, I managed to get all wrong. The lady on the phone was very nice, and although it was 7 at night, she arranged the phone consultation for 10 am the next day.

I chose to not have my GP contacted, as a neighbour on my road is a receptionist there, and I didn’t know how well patient confidentiality would stretch.

I'd called BPAS but was referred to NUPAS and chose Finchley

Now, this was when I began to worry. I had called BPAS, taking time to investigate the various clinics locally between Marie Stopes [Stories of abortions at Marie Stopes clinics] and choosing BPAS purely because the centre was slightly further away. I didn’t want to bump into anyone I knew. However, the following day, during the phone consultation I was given the option of the clinics, and it was none of the ones I had researched.

That was when the lady let me know I had been referred to NUPAS. A completely separate organisation. This was better for me entirely, the Finchley centre was a 15-minute drive away, it had free parking.

Truth be told, I had just wanted to get this over and done with. It was also my first day of a new semester at uni, my supersonic sense of smell could detect the finest traces of body odour and made me sick to my stomach. They made the clinic appointment for just over a week later, Thursday the 30th of Jan.

My initial appointment

By the initial appointment, my symptoms were much worse. My partner took a day off work and accompanied me to the clinic, it was a two-hour wait and was very hot. I was surprised by the sort of questions I was asked. They noted down how long I had been in a relationship for, whether he was older than I was, asked whether he let me have my own money etc. I was taken back, I had no idea this would come up.

I am lucky that I have a great relationship, this also happens away from your partner or any support you bring, so if there’s anyone reading this post, and suffers from an abusive relationship, I hope this can prepare you and give you encouragement to seek support through the abortion provider.

This was the hardest and most daunting part

After another wait I was called back in, they don’t call out your name here, but a colour coded card and number attached to your chart. The people in the waiting room have no idea what stage of treatment you are at or what you are there for.

However, I will note you do share the same waiting area as a Walk-in Centre, although on different sides. I did feel judged, I got anxious wondering whether people waiting with snotty nose children would think I was the devil for aborting a baby. This was the hardest and most daunting part for me.

The nurse pricked my finger and took blood for Rapid HIV, syphilis, iron levels and the positive/negative blood grouping.

I asked to see the ultrasound screen

Then I was advised to empty my bladder for the transvaginal ultrasound. They don’t show you the screen, but I asked to see it. I wanted a small memory token of my pregnancy. The nurse was happy to show me and described the stage of pregnancy I was in and showed me the small little tadpole I had inside me.

I wouldn’t be nervous of this stage, the wand she inserted wasn’t large, nothing like having an STD check or smear test.

My next appointment to take the first pill was the following Monday.

Day 1- Mifepristone and antibiotics

For this stage, I went alone. And was in and out in under 30 minutes. I was given the Mifepristone to take in the clinic, as well as 4 antibiotics to take that evening with dinner. They didn’t write down the instructions for you, so if you are a "clutter" head, like me, then write it down immediately.

I spent the rest of the day in bed. The morning after, I woke up feeling awful. I was dizzy, and slight cramping had begun and the subtle spotting started, like you get at the beginning of a period.

Day 2 - Misoprostol

My partner came with me again the next day for the second tablet. This is the Misoprostol, they offered me the choice of having this given bucally, to dissolve under the gum, but I was scared of not being able to eat and drink for the 30 minutes, how else would I be dosing myself up with a cocktail of ibuprofen and paracetamol? So I opted for having it inserted vaginally.

I was also offered pain relief in my bum, but I declined. I’d suffered from diarrhoea for weeks, I didn’t want to struggle to make it home knowing it would make me want to go. I was made to take 4 more tablets of antibiotics. And was sent home with condoms, a pregnancy test to take after 4 weeks and an advice sheet.

I’ve always suffered terrible period pain but I couldn't take Nurofen

The pain was bad. I’ve always suffered from terrible period pain and knew that Nurofen was the only thing to ease it. When I asked the nurse at the first appointment whether I could take it, she helpfully told me I could look it up online. I did look it up online, very late and realised I couldn’t take it.

I bled heavily but saw nothing different for 2 days

I had expected gushes of blood, flooding pads, and seeing the thing in it. I did bleed heavily, however, I failed to see as they put it at the clinic "the product of conception". This worried me a lot, I only started to see clots and clumps way different to period clots two days later.

During this time I was constantly worried it hadn’t worked. But my nausea had disappeared, I was still tired and weak but I knew that was because I had low iron levels.

I've bled consistently for over a week since the abortion

Since then I have bled consistently for over a week since the abortion so I am more hopeful that it has been dispelled, and I either didn’t see the infamous "sac" or it had disintegrated.

I hope this is helpful to anyone reading this. I know it was long and didn’t really go into the gore and horrible stuff, a lot more of the other posts cover that well enough.

I am happy I aborted the pregnancy, I also advise anyone to let people in their lives know. You need that love and support.